DIANE KEATON (1946 – )                        

[After landing her first major stage role in the Broadway musical ‘Hair’, as understudy to the lead, and gained attention by not removing her clothing, she wrote to her family about the show]: ‘After the show tonight, Richard Avedon is photographing the whole cast for Vogue magazine. Now, is that astonishing or what? And big stars have come to see it, like Warren Beatty (remember my crush on him from Splendour in the Grass) and Julie Christie, who is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, and Liza Minnelli, and Terence Stamp, and Carol Channing. Apparently, ‘Hair’ is the ‘in’ thing to see. People stand in lines every day to get tickets…Dad, I hope you prepared your friend for ‘Hair’ and the nudity. Is he coming soon?’

Diane in the musical ‘Hair’ in 1967

[Diane wrote to her mother in February 1969, describing her first dinner date with Woody Allen]: ‘We went to Frankie & Johnnie’s famous steakhouse. Everything was going well until I scraped my fork against the plate and made a normal, I stress normal, cutting noise. It must have driven him nuts because he yelped out loud! I couldn’t figure out how to cut my steak without making the same mistake, so I stopped eating and started talking about women’s status in the arts, like I know anything about women and the arts. What an idiot.’

Diane & Woody Allen

[If readers are wondering what Diane ever saw in Woody Allen, the following should be self-explanatory]: ‘Woody Allen and I met in the fall of 1968 at the Broadhurst Theatre while I was auditioning for Play it Again, Sam. We read together…During rehearsal, I fell for Allan [Felix, played by Woody] as scripted, but for Woody as well. How could I not? I was in love with him before I knew him. He was Woody Allen…He was so hip, with his thick glasses and cool suits. But it was his manner that got me, his way of gesturing, his hands, his coughing and looking down in a self-deprecating way while he told jokes like: ‘I couldn’t get a date for New Year’s Eve so I went home and jumped naked into a vat of Roosevelt dimes’, or, ‘I’d rather be with a beautiful woman than anything else except my stamp collection’. Things like that. He was even better-looking in real life. He had a great body, and he was physically very graceful.’

with Pacino in The Godfather (1974)

[Keaton wrote about her relationship with Al Pacino, one that began with The Godfather (1974) and would continue, on-again, off-again, for twenty years until 1991]: ‘I met Al Pacino at O’Neal’s Bar near Lincoln Centre…We were told to get to know each other before we auditioned for The Godfather. I was nervous. The first thing I noticed about Al was his nose. It was long like a cucumber. The second thing I noticed was the kinetic way he moved. He seemed nervous too. I don’t remember talking about the script. I remember his killer Roman nose sitting in the middle of what remains a remarkable face. It was too bad he wasn’t available, but neither was I. Even so, for the next twenty years Al Pacino would be my only recurring ‘unattainable great’. Recently, I went to a screening and fell in love with Al all over again. The whole package. For me The Godfathers, all three of them, were about one thing – Al. It was as simple as that.’

Dating Al Pacino

[Diane also had an inauspicious first meeting with Marlon Brando early in rehearsals for The Godfather.]: ‘Besides being introduced to Mr. Brando at the reading of The Godfather, the only encounter we shared was when he passed me on the set and said, ‘Nice tits.’ That wasn’t going to help.’

[Miss Keaton recalled the 1978 Academy Awards evening at which she won an Oscar for Annie Hall]: ‘Kirk Douglas spoke into Army Archard’s microphone as he waved to the crowd. The frenzy of outstretched arms couldn’t have cared less about Kirk Douglas. They were shouting for the attention of a twenty-four year-old stunner named John Travolta, approaching his first big moment on the red carpet. That’s what I noticed. Nothing lasts. The three-hour ceremony was endless anxiety. Midway through, I snuck to the lobby, where I caught Richard Burton smoking a cigarette. He looked up and said something about doubting he would ever win one of ‘these damn things’. I nodded. What else could I do? I was standing next to a legend. He was right. He didn’t win. Richard Dreyfuss did. The image of Dreyfuss slapping his hands and pumping his fists was hard to top, but the encounter with Richard Burton’s face up close and personal had more staying power. I guess losing is a more human experience.’

[Meeting Audrey Hepburn in 1978]: ‘Audrey Hepburn was sixty-three when she died of cancer. She was forty-eight when I met her, not exactly what you’d call old. Backstage I pretended to listen to her words, but in truth I couldn’t get my mind off age and what it does to a person…Instead of taking the time to have a conversation with Audrey Hepburn, I chose to hightail it out of her company as fast as I could. It is another regret in a growing list of regrets.’

Dating Warren Beatty

[Meeting Warren Beatty]: ‘I met with Warren Beatty for his movie Heaven Can Wait and turned him down to hit the bars as Theresa Dunn in Looking for Mr. Goodbar…When warren called me on Christmas Eve, it wasn’t about a job. And he kept calling. In January of 1978 Warren and I started hanging out. I told myself it was temporary. I could handle it… I fell. I kept falling for a long time. He grabbed me from the first moment I saw him in the lobby of the Beverly Wilshire Hotel way back in 1972.’

[Diane wrote of Beatty’s considerate nature]: ‘After I confessed how terrified I was to fly, Warren surprised me as I was about to board a flight to New York, took my hand, walked me into the plane, sat down still holding my hand, and never let go until we landed. Once safe on the ground he kissed me, turned around, and flew back to L.A. On Valentine’s Day he bought me a sauna for one bathroom and a steam room for the other He was full of magnanimous gestures.’

[Diane and Al Pacino]: ‘In the middle of the Godfather Pt III shoot in Rome, I gave Al an ultimatum. Marry me, or at least commit to the possibility. We broke up, got back together, and went on to spend another year implementing our predictable pattern of break-ups. Poor Al, he never wanted it. Poor me, I never stopped insisting. Thinking back on my motives makes me wonder why the rewards of reality kept losing out to the lure of fantasy… Back in Palermo three weeks later, the tension on the set was explosive…After dozens of break-ups, Al and I broke up again. Masters of avoidance, we did not say hello.’

In the company of Jack Nicholson

[Jack Nicholson surprised Diane after the Something’s Gotta Give shoot in 2003]: ‘It had been a long shoot, six months to be exact. After our last shot, Jack hugged me goodbye, saying something about a little piece. I hugged him back and we went our separate ways. Two years later, a check with a lot of zeroes arrived in the mail for my back-end percentage on Something’s Gotta Give. I didn’t have a back-end deal. There must have been some mistake. I called my business manager, who told me it was from Jack Nicholson. Jack? That’s when I remembered him saying something about a little piece when we hugged goodbye. Oh, my God. He meant he was going to give me a piece of his own percentage.’